I recently discovered this craze called "The 5 Love Languages" which I saw on an episode of Oprah. (Confession: my Sunday mornings are spent in front of the TV having a spiritual experience watching OWN's Super Soul Sundays. Don't judge me!) The theory is about how each individual has different love languages and how they express their love their partner. As I get older, I realize that you can't love every person the same. Some people appreciate support through words, and others prefer actions. Some people like receiving gifts, and others do not. Some people are touchy-feely and others are not.
I thought it sounded really interesting so I decided to look it up online and take its Love Languages quiz. I was curious to know both husband-ji's and myself. I was completely surprised by both of our results. We answered the questions in a fast, subconscious way so we didn't have time to think about it.
I kind of already know that I am high maintenance, but seriously - I am soooooo much more high maintenance than I thought! I just require so many bloody words of affirmation! Husband-ji is always trying to get me gifts because he thinks that women like material things - which certainly I do not. Whenever he gives me a material gift I literally think of clutter. Little did he know that he is dealing with an emotionally high maintenance wife, not a financial one! Poor husband-ji....the man of few words!
Husband-ji, being such a typical Indian man - wants predominantly acts of service and quality time, and only very few words of affirmation. So that basically means I need to pamper him whilst always being by his side - and silent. The ideal Indian wife...ha!!!!
I was definitely surprised that husband-ji requires a good amount of quality time, since he told me last month that he doesn't require any alone time with me! I guess he does appreciate our date nights, after all! And I was also surprised that diva husband-ji (who has 80+ pairs of shoes) doesn't like to get pampered by gifts. Basically, instead of gifts - I should cook him something (looks like I was spot-on with his birthday this year!)
Another thing I was surprised at is anti-PDA husband-ji is a way bigger pervert than me. Seriously. His physical touch category is TWO points higher than mine! I have been joking him for the past week and calling him a "secret pervert" at every chance I get! But in reality, for him - it probably means he requires an extra back scratch or a hair oil massage!
After nearly 9 years of being together with your spouse - you think you know them like the back of your hand. But taking this quiz really surprised me! Perhaps going forward, we can really speak the same love language.
I think this quiz is especially helpful when you are married because you are in it for the long haul. It is helpful to know in what ways your spouse wants to feel supported or loved, and it is helpful to know your own needs in a relationship as well.
Dear readers, have you taken the Love Languages quiz? Were you surprised by the results in yourself or your partner?