Wednesday, August 14, 2013

The double trouble experiment

(Taking the babies to Kits beach)

This past week, husband-ji and I took on the amazing challenge of having one of Maya's baby BFF's (Sky) stay with us for FOUR days!!! I agreed to this because I wanted to see if we could handle having two children.

I've been thinking about it a lot, and it is impossible to know when the right time is to have a second child. When Maya turned 1, and when she started walking and getting more independent, I started to really miss having a small baby who was always in my arms. With her walking around, it is me who has a seperation anxiety! (Insane helicopter mum, I know..)

My absolute dream is to have 4 daughters that are each 3-ish years apart (not that I can choose the gender!) Husband-ji only wants to have one child, but I know he will end up compromising with me ;)
So this was a big test for me - and us - to really see what it is like balancing two kids. Even though I know it would not be the same because if we had another child there would be the age difference (unless it was twins - god forbid!) But just having two in the house at once, for several days and overnight, was a good experiment in preparation - or as close as you can get to preparation!

It was nice to have Sky stay with us, she is a really easy baby - eats nicely, sleeps well, and plays with Maya very well. Maya likes a lot of attention, which can be demanding at times. She has gotten so much attention since birth that she totally expects it - so I feel like I have to entertain her sometimes, and interact with her. Sky is the opposite. So it was great to have Sky there to entertain Maya, and vice versa.

They played together really nicely and when both were playing with the same toy, one of them would give it up without a fight. Maya is walking/running, but Sky is not walking yet, even though they are both the same age. They were not competitive with each other at all, which is what I was worried about with girls. Maya would go over to Sky and pat her on the back like she does with her dolly; and Sky would hold Maya and launch herself to walk (behind Maya like a train). It was like they were teaching each other and helping each other, which was so cute to watch.

(Double trouble)

One question I've heard moms ask is, "By having more kids do you have less time?" and that I discovered was true. I felt like I was doing constant diaper duty, and constant feedings - everything double double - so technically, I did have less time. And it was difficult in the beginning that they were on completely different nap schedules. They both sleep the same amount at night, but Sky goes to bed an hour or two before Maya. And Maya only takes one nap during the day, while Skylar takes two. But by Day 3, I finally got both of them to nap at the same time, which was an absolute miracle. I felt like supermom!!! Because they were on different schedules, and Sky only naps in her crib, so I had to stay home all I kind of got cabin fever.

So it is easier in the sense that they play with each other, but harder that you do have less time. I really enjoyed having both of them together, and it was fun for us to watch them interact. It was like we were one big happy family - which is my dream! I think husband-ji liked it too, he liked to see them play with each other. So with my excellent powers of persuasion, I know he'll come around to the idea of another child...eventually.

The double diapers were a bit much though. I said we were living in "the house of poo" because as soon as one diaper change was over, I had to do another one - which was very tedious. So ideally, I'd like Maya to be potty-trained before we have another baby.

(Watching the sunset with the girls)

I was pleasantly surprised that I handled the girls quite well - I never got stressed out or frantically had to call husband-ji home from work. I knew the signals - hungry, tired, play - like a total pro! I think it also helps that I'm crazy organized which is why I don't get too overwhelmed. That, and babies don't scare me anymore! Well, duh...I'm a professional mom now..

The pros/cons of having two children under 2:

They can play together/entertain each other
Fun for us to watch them interact - the more the merrier
1 diaper bag for both

Constant diaper duty
Less free time if they are on different nap schedules
Both are heavy to carry - double the load!

After the 4 days were over, my back was so messed up that we had to go to the chiropractor - and husband-ji was so tired that he said, "We are never babysitting ever again!" I think it was a good experiment, and I'm glad I tried it before having another baby! Seriously...toddlers are SO much work!!!



  1. I remember when my eldest started walking, I also felt like having a second child, but in the end my kids have 6 years difference. It was a little strange getting back into diaper mode while having a child learning to read at the same time... In the end, I think there is no perfect age difference. And maybe having 2 children is more work, but it's worth it :)

    1. I totally agree...I just can't wait! Children are such a blessing. Maya is growing up so she is dancing all the time! When God wills it, it will happen...but first I should probably unpack the 3rd bedroom in my apartment, just in case! lol


Respectful comments only, please! (That means you, anonymous.)

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...
© Madh Mama. All rights reserved.