Saturday, February 15, 2014

Our Valentine's Day 2014

Our Valentine's Day this year was pretty uneventful, but quiet and sweet. This year was actually the first year that I have ever forgot it was Valentine's Day until - literally - the night before. I usually am giving poor husband-ji warnings, soon after New Years that he better get me flowers or do something romantic, or else. But this year, it was all a blur...we have been so busy with our day-to-day grind & Maya's non-stop shenanigans! 

This year, I told husband-ji that I wasn't in the mood to celebrate because my dad is having some health problems. I just didn't feel like it because I thought it wasn't important - and besides, we had just celebrated our 8 year anniversary last month. (I am really turning into an old fart!!!) My blogger friend Andrea said that it's easy to forget Valentine's Day when love is a daily part of your life.


On Valentine's Day morning, husband-ji surprised me with a cute little gift pack of bath stuff from The Beauty Bar. I thought it was such a sweet gesture. Despite everything that is going on, he still wanted to pamper me! OMG...SWOON!!! Apparently he bought the gift a week in advance - which is totally out of character for him (usually he gets things the day before / day of). Maybe my super-planning personality is starting to rub off on him!

(( Is it just me or does Valentine's Day feel like Mother's Day #2? ))

I continued on my day with Maya, and then in the evening, I cooked him his favorite Carrot Masala (recipe coming soon) and Aloo Masala Capsicum. Oh yes, I am such a professional Indian wifey, yaar....I cooked TWO curries and the SAME time!!! I think I just upgraded myself to gold status...LOL! Of course, my MIL would probably only give me a B- grade because I didn't make Sambar/Rasam to go with it!

After dinner, we watched a few episodes of The Walking Dead, which was recommended to me by one of my blog readers. I just love to watch horror shows on Valentine's Day (weird, I know...) Since we were watching it from the beginning, husband-ji got addicted too...thank god, something other than his Food Network!

Click HERE to see what we did for Valentine's Day last year.


Dear readers, what did you do for Valentine's day? Do you celebrate it - why or why not?



  1. Cute invaluable gift to father .God bless her and lovable family.

    1. I agree, I think the card is better than any material gift!

  2. @Alexandra

    We do celebrate Valentine's Day because for most Indians it is just another day. February 13th is my son's birthday so every year we are dead tired to do anything. This year due to a death in family we did not celebrate the birthday but went to the mall for some food on the 14th. There was lot of decorations and young couples enjoying. I like Valentine's Day because there is nothing in our culture that celebrates love. Forget culture, what the heck, enjoy.

    Valentine's Day evokes strong reactions in India. There right wing groups which target young people and card shops to prevent this impurity of our culture. There are liberal minded people who take as an attack on the freedom of expression. There is a vast majority pretend this is something irrelevant. It is western and nothing to do with our culture. They dismiss it with "righteous disdain". The parents of young girls are absolutely pertified of such events. I guess our uneasiness comes from the pubic display of afffection by young couples and the whole consumer culture surrounding it. I guess parent of girls are always suspicious of this "dating business" no matter which culture they belong.

    For most others, it a day of amusement to pull each other's legs, bit of a joke. Since there is no concept of love in India, it is regarded as a foolish activity induldged by young people. I guess our spouses are our Valentine's most of the time. No excitment of pre-marrige turbulent romance.

    1. Happy birthday to your son!
      I have heard many Indians do not celebrate it, but a lot of youngsters are starting. I like having a holiday that is romantic - it is sweet.
      That is so interesting about the right-wing groups. Since when did love become impure? What about love between husband and wife? How are they to know which couples are married or not, they just want to go around harassing people, ugh. Crazy mentality.
      I remember before I was married and Valentine's Day was a make-it or break-it type of day, hahaha! If your boyfriend did not do some sweet gesture, you had to break up with him because he ruined it.
      Here all the restaurants are completely booked weeks in advance and they have special Valentines couples meals. It is a little bit consumerist, but I'm a sucker for love and all the little hearts decorations are just too cute...

    2. @Alexandra

      Love as Indians understand is of too type. One is divine love between like Krishna and Radha. Some say Radha was married. Since they were both divine beings, it was allright. More like devotion and less like physical love. Then there tragic love pairs Laila-Majnu, Heer-Ranja, Shree-Farad. All of were separated due to social restrictions and died. So, we presume that love is either divine or tragic. Digesting a love story in real life is different for us. We are programmed that way. It is because of lack of interaction between the sexes at an early age outside social restrictions. You cannot socialize with the opposite sex openly. Women are told that men are after one thing and men are told, well they are told nothing. Though these things are changing now, for better or worse. We are now heading in the opposite direction at break neck speed.

      Indians are envious of those who get into love marriages. They are considered brave people. The word for love in Hindi is "Chakkar" (affair) which has negative connotations. Some even look down upon such people. "Oh you know our children don't get into these things". Something about love marriages make us very uneasy. Perhaps we are not comfortable with the physical part of love.

    3. @anonymous - so interesting what you said.
      yes, there is this strange connotation that love marriages = lustful. To that, I say they are instead "love-full" :) The lustful implication only depicts a fleeting physical obsession and does not show that it is mind-body-spirit divine connection - soulmates.
      I think to find a life partner independently is one of the most amazing things on Earth. Somebody completely different, it makes me believe in destiny. I am surprised that most Indians are nervous about love marriages considering the aspect of "destiny" as I felt during our Hindu marriage in which we would be together for seven lifetimes. That is destiny in its purest forms, that means I will find him, or he will find me...and it will not be our parents selecting with preferences of "MBA, fair skinned" etc. I really think it is all a control thing for many conservative Indian parents.
      My whole family is filled with love marriages for centuries. My grandparents fell in love as Canadians who were both studying abroad in the USA. My grandmother was the only Canadian woman there at college with him, and only 1 out of five women at the university. They fell in love and moved back to Ottawa together, of course they did not live together until after marriage though. They were also from different religions and my grandfather stopped practicing his so that she could raise the kids in hers.
      Every Valentine's Day, my grandfather would get my grandmother a box of chocolates with a love note. The last one he wrote before he died was, "Dear Jo, to my darling wife of 60+ years"....he had forgot exactly how many years they had been married but he knew it was over 60

  3. Such a nice way husband-Ji celebrated Valentine's Day for his two best girls! Alex, you are so great, cooking such a great indian meal for hubby. Gosh, this kind of brings back memories for me growing up. My Father always got a box of chocolates for me and my mother, such indulgence, every year. We really just need to hug our significant other and tell them we love them. It is easy to forget Valentines Day when you express and love someone everyday!


    1. So sweet, your dad was so romantic! My parents do not celebrate it, but my grandparents did. My grandpa would get chocolates for my grandma with a card that said "to my darling wife of 60+ years" was so cute :)


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